So a few days ago, a sweet friend told me about this course called ‘Transformed’ by Yasmin Mogahed. We were talking on the phone, one thing led to another and she was like oh, she did this course and she’ll share her password with me so that I can do it too.
Love. 4 letters, such a short word yet there are so many misconceptions about what it should be or what it should look like. In one of the first modules, titled “Introduction to Love”, Yasmin talks about how it goes back to The Source. We have the need to give and receive love in our fitra, but for us to quench this thirst, we need to know the source. Allah is Al Wadud, the source of love itself, not the creations. He is also As Salam, the source of peace as He is Al Wahhab, the giver of gifts. Have you ever felt love so deeply for someone? I’m not even talking about romantically cause why would I love a m*n?(y’all I’m joking please, aure na ke so). Back to my point, like your friends, where you just love them so much because they add to your peace of mind, you get to be yourself with them, they make you better and all in all you just do. Have you ever thought about that love you feel as a gift from Allah? As a provision He has provided to you? Not because we’re worthy of such gifts, or because we’re “good”, or because we deserve it. No, it’s simply out of His generosity as Al Kareem.
When she put it this way, it changed so much for me because now you can think of it as “Allah has given me the gift of this person’s love” and “Allah has placed the love of this person in my heart.” It changes so much, because we won’t be put in situations where we’re loving the gift more than The Giver. Rather, it would make you love the Giver more. Thinking of it this way also let’s us love people through Him and because of Him. What would this mean in reality? That we take a step back from unconsciously putting those we love on pedestals. Yes, I see you for you, I know you’re not perfect and that’s okay because perfection only belongs to The One who created you.
The next module is “Enjoyment of love only without desperate need”. When you’re in a place of starvation, lack, or need, you’re in the position to take and take. However, when your source is an unending one, you’re in a position to be much more generous. What this means is that you won’t settle. Go to Him to feel you up emotionally, spiritually, and in every other way. If you think love is all about someone making you feel “complete”, then darling, you’ve got it all wrong. We are constantly in need as humans but Allah is Al Ghanniy, The Rich. Do you see that if you’re waiting for someone to complete you then it’s basically you begging from another beggar? This is because in reality, we all lack something. Self sufficiency only belongs to Allah.
“We have a choice. We can learn the tools that help us get to our destination, or we can continue to repeat those same patterns that keep us stuck.” What will we choose?
To everyone reading this, I pray you find relationships where you’re loved for who you are. That you’re loved just because you exist, wholeheartedly, softly, gently, with patience and every other thing you desire, including the things you didn’t know you needed. Spaces that provide safety and warmth. Spaces you can show your inner self to without having to think it would be deflected. Spaces where your voice matters and your boundaries are respected. People that just let you be. Let you feel, let you speak, let you stay silent, let you love without thinking “this is too much”. People who see you for you, hold you accountable, and add more to the light that already exists in you rather than dimming it. Amin x
Sending love and digital hugs💗